These are the awkward moments at the end of a season were I struggle to think of exactly what I’m going to talk about. The FA Cup spectacle is still fresh in my mind and the glory still pulses throw my veins like that bloody silly bit in Wanted when James McAvoy realises he can slow down time and curve bullets around corners.
Incidentally, I don’t think any film has made me exclaim, “Really?!” more than Wanted. I tend to go for movies with realism more often than not and when presented with something that possesses anything but, I’m prone to exclamations of discontent. Bloody silly, it was – aside from hearing Morgan Freeman use the word, “motherf**ker”, that was quite brilliant.
I’m going off topic…
It’s hard to know where to begin, to tell the truth. I’m rambling here just to fill up a few columns. Now that the business end of our footballing calendar has come to such a wondrous close, all that remains is discussions of what’ll happen over the summer regarding recruitment and the World Cup.
Some people hate transfer gossip and all those websites that draw you in with false promises of ‘scoops’ and such. I find it all quite amusing – like a really terrible soap opera you find yourself compelled to watch. Often I like to make fun of it all, hence the reason today’s title is so moronic.
Truthfully, however, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t quite enjoy it. There’s a part of me happy to read through dross I know to be mendacious purely because I like to imagine whichever player mentioned in an Arsenal shirt and what his fortunes might be. Occasionally, I like to invent silly titles like the ones splattered across the web just for the fun of it. Titles that might sound a little something like this:
“Arsenal in mega convoy of super clubs yearning to release monetary glory all over the face of this Serie A club for exclusive rights to uber-starlet’s underwear range”
“Arsene Wenger spotted enjoying Meatball Marinara Subway on his way to buy Kalashnikov from Parisian slum in exchange for Sebastien Frey’s nightmares”
“Goat causes rapture amongst Arsenal squad as Mesut Ozil explodes into song and unleashes banshee at Werder Bremen in hope to tempt unborn foetus into Arsenal training camp”
“Lemmings invade Yaya Sanogo’s subconscious! Arsene Wenger eager to buy these 5 strikers to apease the dark forces from beneath”
I’m just being bloody silly. There are other things I could talk about of note. For examples, I have recently begun to enjoy the occasional flutter and I might mention the advantages of playing online bingo in today’s market which are actually relatively obvious; there’s not travelling involved, nor do you have to endure the irksome cackles of “HOUSE” when a smart-arse pensioner cleans up.
Okay, this could very well be my worst blog post of all time. No – hold on.. F**k you, I kinda like it. Sure, there’s absolutely no point to it at all and there’s no structure, but hey – it reflects me in many ways (mostly bad). I think it’s probably best we forget this one.
Fear not, intrepid peruser, for I shall be endeavouring to bring you much glorious news and new stuff as the following months progress. Should you wish to offer a charitable donation towards these activities – blogging and podcasting is quite expensive to do if you want the best equipment – feel free to fire a little something my way. You can do so by clicking here.
Judging what I’ve written today, I might use some of that cash to have myself sectioned. I’ll look forward to the comments and leave you with a challenge; invent your own ridiculous headline like the hit-seeking ones plastered all over the aggregations sites. I’ll give a special mention to my favourite.
That’s all for today. I shall be back tomorrow with more. As always; thanks for reading, you beautiful bastards.