The Armchair Gooner

An Arsenal blog bringing you news, opinion and humour on a daily basis. Well, I'll try at the very least…

Quotes, rumours, news, bits, stuff, and other things.

Inspiration? Not today…

Morning folks.

I have a rule; don’t post anything unless you have something to say. Today I’m breaking that rule. I’ve scoured the Interweb for inspiration, only to be left empty handed and sporting a furrowed brow. I’ve consulted Big Ted, hoping for some pearls of wisdom, and all he could muster was silence and a glare that made me feel unsettled (I realise talking to my bear might make me sound mentally unstable, but I don’t especially care).

Most column inches and blog posts are taken up condemning Santi Cazorla’s dive with the kind of misplaced self-righteousness you only find from football fans. I myself wouldn’t deny he dived – I didn’t yesterday – but I’d be lying if I said it bothered me. The whole debate strikes me as a little silly; there aren’t many clubs that can claim to be free of simulation, so why the indignation when an opponent does it? It’s the joys of being biased, I guess. I’d scream bloody murder if such a thing happened to Arsenal, but I’ll gladly admit one of our players dived, and then carry on not caring about it.

Those column inches not dedicated to excessive writhing in the hope of penalties are filled with rumour and gossip. January isn’t far away now, so the speculation juggernaut is going up through the gears. From beneath the rocks they’ve hibernated, the ‘ITKs’ will resurface. You know the type I mean; they try to appear important by stating things like this:

“Walcott having medical at Anfield. Arsenal will make one last bid to keep him. The player favours Liverpool. My source at the club is rarely wrong”.

Or this:

“Arsenal have signed Klass-Jan Huntelaar for £7m. Deal to be announced Friday. If it doesn’t happen, I will never post again”

I’ve been around the Blogosphere long enough to know the spurious accounts on Twitter when I see them. My mind’s eye pictures those responsible as wretched creatures sat in a darkened room desperately trying to obtain some level of attention and notoriety by praying on the many fans out there who just want news – Caught Offside is the worst example of this I’ve ever seen.

There’s no avoiding them. They’ve already started their tales of “insider knowledge” and false declarations of being football agents. If you are someone looking for news, my advice would be this: don’t believe anything you read unless it come with a confirmation on the Club’s official site.

All I’ll ever do is discuss the merits of some players mentioned. What you won’t find me doing is purposefully providing you with false information, or inventing things to get my lovely site a few more hits. I’m a considerate fellow, I am.

Right. I’m off to bed. That may sound odd given the time this post will go live (8am), but I’m writing and scheduling the night before.

I’ll finish with a question: What the most ludicrous transfer rumour you’ve ever heard? The comments below await a few of your answers.

Thanks for reading, you beautiful bastards. I shall return tomorrow with a preview of the big one; Bradford in the Capital One Cup.

Category: News

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  • Admir says:

    I’d pick just two:

    1.Alessandro Nesta from SS Lazio to AS Roma about 10 years ago, just before he went to AC Milan due to Lazio financial problems – it would be equal of rumour that Jack Wilshere would join the Spuds.

    2.David Beckham from FAnchester United to Arsenal FC in 1999 – whole transfer would cost 40 million pounds, 25 million would be paid to United and 15 million to Beckham in five years.

    December 10, 2012 at 9:45 am
  • reallycrossross says:

    The most ludicrous rumour is the fact that we have so far (since 1st September 2012) been linked with no fewer than 180 players. These range from 14 year olds Miraz Mustafic and Giancarlo Poveda to Frank (I’m fat) Lampard. Fat Frank is the most ludicrous in my opinion! No, he is ludicrously fat!

    December 10, 2012 at 10:18 am
    • Admir says:

      Now when you mentioned it, there was a story about Cashley Cole returning to Arsenal on a free transfer next summer. That is the worst one ever.

      December 10, 2012 at 11:10 am
    • James 'Raul' Stokes says:

      Agreed. I couldn’t think of one thing he’d offer us.

      December 11, 2012 at 12:27 am
  • Patrick says:

    I feel the most ludicrous one was Arsenal being in for Carlos Tevez last summer.
    Secondly i dont think its weird you talk to Big Ted
    I have a tiger stuff toy called Hobbes who i still talk to and was my only friend growing up

    December 10, 2012 at 12:49 pm
    • James 'Raul' Stokes says:

      I can relate to that very much. I’m 34 now, and I’ve had Big Ted since the day of my birth. He’s been a constant in my life.

      December 11, 2012 at 12:29 am

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