Friday greetings, boys ‘n’ girls.
Quite some time ago, a work colleague of mine told me a story about themselves in which they woke up at 3am with an incredible craving for chocolate. For reasons beyond my comprehension, I found this unbelievably hilarious. What I’m certain was a fairly humdrum affair in reality, exists in head head as the following; I picture him – a middle-aged manager – waking up in a flash, bolt-upright and screaming “I NEED FUCKING CHOCOLATE!” and then proceeding to furiously rummage through his wife’s handbag for a Crunchie. If that failed, he’d dart downstairs in his Scrooge-like pyjamas and drive to the nearest petrol station at 100mph with his face pressed against the glass, breathing heavily and snarling.
The reason I bring this up, is that I imagine on the last night before the summer transfer window closed, Arsene Wenger did something similar. I’d wager he woke up in a frenzy, hit with the sudden realisation that the squad was in dire need of reinforcements. That final day in August, he was a blur or activity, screaming at Pat Rice, asking him why he hadn’t made him aware of the need to recruit sooner. “PAT! WE NEED A FUCKING MIDFIELDER! DON’T JUST SIT THERE!”
Of course, the main reason for me sharing such an idiotic notion is the paucity of Arsenal related news out there, and I’m merely trying to fill up this post. The only tidbit of news is PSG’s alleged desire to bid somewhere in the region of £5m for our stylist’s apprentice, Marouane Chamakh – a deal that we’d be mad not to rip their arms of should it be offered. When the Moroccan first came to the club, I was actually quite impressed with him, he looked a good bit of business on a free transfer. Once a decent few months passed, he descended into being, well, quite frankly, shit.
Unlike the summer of last year, I expect us to conduct our business quickly and efficiently his time around. It’s been stated before in seasons past that this opportunity to purchase will be the occasion “Wenger has a clear out” and nothing has materialised. Call me naive, if you will, but I am convinced this time will be different. I hope to be proved correct.
That’s all for today, folks. Tomorrow sees the return of Arsenal and a trip to QPR. I’ll be posting a preview of the game with my upcoming post on Saturday. Until then, enjoy your day and thanks for reading, you beautiful bastards. Take a moment to comment below, and you can follow me on Twitter – @_ArmchairGooner
Finally, you can read my latest column at Arsenal Vision here.